Actual Courtroom Quotations

Actual Courtroom Quotations

The following are actual quotations from actual trials:

• Lawyer: “Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?”
• Witness: “No.”
• Lawyer: “Did you check for blood pressure?”
• Witness: “No.”
• Lawyer: “Did you check for breathing?”
• Witness: “No.”
• Lawyer: “So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?”
• Witness: “No.”
• Lawyer: “How can you be so sure, Doctor?”
• Witness: “Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.”
• Lawyer: “But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?”
• Witness: “Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere.”
• Lawyer: “This myasthenia gravis — does it affect your memory at all?”
• Witness: “Yes.”
• Lawyer: “And in what ways does it affect your memory?”
• Witness: “I forget.”
• Lawyer: “You forget. Can you give us an example of something that you’ve forgotten?”
• Lawyer: “Trooper, when you stopped the defendant, were your red and blue lights flashing?”
• Witness: “Yes.”
• Lawyer: “Did the defendant say anything when she got out of her car?”
• Witness: “Yes, sir.”
• Lawyer: “What did she say?”
• Witness: “‘What disco am I at?’”
• Lawyer: “What happened then?”
• Witness: “He told me, he says, ‘I have to kill you because you can identify me.’”
• Lawyer: “Did he kill you?”
• Witness: “No.”